I recently got a
Netflix account and logged into that baby through my PS3. The first thing I did
with it, rewatch The Twilight Zone. But then something greater occurred to me;
“Why don’t I watch Columbo again?” And seeing no reasonable answer against such
a decision, I started watching the good Lieutenant from the very first, to it’s
very last. Not all episodes are on Netflix, so I had to acquire those through
nefarious means, but man what a joy it was. I forgot just how damn good this
show was.
The true genius of the
show was letting Peter Falk (Columbo) just do his thing. From his raspy cigar
toned voice, the signature wardrobe (with famous rain coat), Columbo distracting
himself midsentence to catch the killers off guard, all the while constantly
asking others for a pencil were all parts of a character that Falk came up
with. Falk created such an unassuming person you can forgive the killers for
underestimating him so much. The lieutenant would get under their skin without them realizing it. On the surface Columbo is an annoyingly dumb
witted, little, underpaid LA cop. But in reality these small self depraving
actions were all a façade to the genius detective that lay within. Columbo was
a predator, and the world was his prey. We just lucked out he was only after
the bad guys.
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| Do you have a pencil? |
Columbo went on for 69
episodes over 35 years, and we surprisingly learnt very little about his
personal life, but the few morsels of information we saw spoke volumes. There
was the time the only witness to a murder was a homeless man, and Columbo’s
first instinct was to get the man to the station to get him fed, cleaned and
have a roof over his head. Sure he had some questions, but he cared about the
homeless man’s well being too. Then there was the time he said that he and his
wife always wanted children but were unable to have any, instead getting very
close to their nieces and nephews. And any time Columbo had access to food, he
would share it with his fellow officers. There was a very working class feel to
Columbo. You got the feeling that his childhood, though loving, might not have
been the easiest while growing up. This all helped to show that he was a deeply
caring man who cared for the ones he loved.
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| Classic Columbo playing along |
On most shows like this, the creators or producers generally try to force a sidekick (usually a hot female) to share the spotlight. And Columbo was no different. There were two reoccurring characters throughout the series. The first and only character to be in every episode along with Columbo was his beat up 1959
Peugeot 403 convertible. This hunk of junk was as run down as Columbo seemed,
but it always got the job done. Sure there were times when it couldn’t go
uphill forcing the lieutenant to walk, but it got him from point A to B. The
second, and less featured co-star was Columbo’s laid back basset hound aptly
named Dog. This animal was as opposite a policeman’s dog as you could get, but
it did suit Columbo. Slow and rarely walking forcing Columbo to carry it, Dog
was the embodiment of Columbo’s façade, and any killer unfortunate enough to see
both man and dog together would fall for the act completely.
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| Stay here, look after the car. I'll be back. |
Columbo was a genius; in
his universe, a living legend. There no doubt would have been countless cities
vying to get him to police their streets. Hell, he was probably offered the
chief of police in LA. But that would have taken him off the beat and behind a
desk permanently, and that would have killed him. He’s not one to sit on the
sidelines, but he didn’t crave the limelight either. He was a humble man,
silent, but constantly observant. It’s what helped make him the greatest
fictional detective ever written (yes, including Sherlock Holmes, the Batman,
or even their bastard child). Unlike those others with their ludicrous amounts of
money, Columbo felt real. You would hope this kind loving man really is walking
our streets, looking out for us. Peter Falk may no longer be with us, and
hopefully that rain coat of his will stay on the coat hanger forever, not dared to be
touched by another, but do yourself a favor, watch an episode or two. Because
if you haven’t already, you don’t know what you’re missing.
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| Ahh sir, just one more thing... |
